Introduction to an Aspiring Doyenne

Yes, I used the word “doyenne” in my title. You will find that I will most likely also use words like “belladonna” and “quaintrelle” and “supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.” No, I am not ‘different’ (maybe…), no, I am not ‘not like other girls,’ no, I do not date vampires (also maybe…), and yes, I did just use a double negative, and will continue to use too many parentheses. I like words. I like language, when used appropriately, and sometimes even when used inappropriately. I also like to write, which is part of what inspired me to take this class. Any course that I am able to write freely in, and am fact EXPECTED to write freely, is a number one is my book.

I am not an English major. I simply have a passion for language and writing and reading and literature. I am also not a music major, however, I have a passion for music of all kinds. I play the cello, when I have time, and am taking steps towards reviving my dedication to it. I am not an actor, although I strongly desire to perform onstage one day. I am also not a vocalist, but can definitely dominate a bar with three or four people swimming in their beers on Thursday night karaoke; and by the way, I love to do so.

I am in fact, a stage manager, at least for the time being. My life revolves around facilitating the fun things that the actors and singers and dancers get to do. I send out emails and type up paperwork, and often times, I feel as though I have a permanent residence in the copy room. My major is work, a lot of work, and while I do find it extremely rewarding at times, it is mostly my responsibility to act as an unsung hero and the one with the contingency plan (or the one with the pencils. “May I use one of those?”) I am very sassy, but don’t get me wrong, my major, or rather my job, is extremely difficult and requires a lot of dedication. My team is the first to arrive in the theatre, and the last to leave. If you ever have the pleasure and privilege of performing onstage somewhere, as an actor, dancer, singer, magician, or otherwise, please thank your stage manager and your stage crew. They put up with a lot of BS to make others look good, but we do it because we love the art that is created as a result of it. If you don’t have the privilege of performing, but find yourself at a corporate gala or product launch, thank your event planner. They perform some of the same duties as a stage manager, and are equally as dedicated (and stressed; although, they work hard to ensure that you never see this side of them).

Now, down to the nitty gritty. Who am I? I am a redhead. I love my planner, enjoy the nerdier side of pop-culture (and the nerdier side of not-pop-culture), and I eat a lot of Mexican food: possibly an unhealthy amount of Mexican food.The quickest way to my heart is queso; or feminism.

unnamed-1
Image Information: “Feed Your Soul” Personal Image; March 2016

 

 

I am an aspiring doyenne, as stated above, and to clarify, a doyenne is defined as “a woman who is the most respected or prominent person in a particular field,” (courtesy of Google). What that means to me, however, is not to be the best, although I have always struggled internally with my raging desire to be number one at everything. To be ‘the most respected or prominent person’ is to have worked my ass off to achieve success. It means that I overcame seemingly unovercomable challenges, and stayed dedicated enough to be on top. I like to act with conviction, and speak with conviction. I am excessively insecure, but I am also excessively over-confident; incidentally, I am working to find the nice and fuzzy happy-medium between the two.

To be a doyenne also means that you are respected, not that you are liked. The two are not the same, however, respect carries a greater weight. I do not want people to hate working with me; in fact, I work very hard and consciously in my daily life to be a good person: to be truthful and compassionate and selfless. If I were taking a Buzzfeed quiz that asked what I would like to be known as, I would choose “the good,” not “the great” or “the wise” or “the powerful.” To be good, however, does not mean that you must be passive. To be compassionate does not mean that you are a pushover.

339-a-strong-women-quote
Image Information: Strong women quotes; courtesy of Women Auto Know

I aspire to push others to the edge of their ability and help them realize their full potential, while keeping a loving and guiding eye out, whether they know it or not. I also aspire to fight for those who are unable to fight for themselves. I do not like bullies, and will always come to the defenses of others.

I will make enemies, that is for certain. There are those who will be threatened by my success, and those who will be irritated by my “bleeding-heart liberalism.”
There are those who will call me a bitch, and those who have done so. As Madonna has said, “I’m tough, I’m ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay.” At the end of the day, as long as I am not infringing on the rights of and intentionally causing pain to others, I am okay. At least, I am learning to be okay.

That’s me, in a nutshell, a very soapbox-y nutshell, I realize. I am a pretty intense person, but I have a love for others and a desire to do good. I like to think that I am both a lover and a fighter; but if you have taken nothing else away from this post, just know that if you need a fancy word, I’m your girl.

 

Advertisements

15 thoughts on “Introduction to an Aspiring Doyenne

  1. Hi, it is nice to meet a fellow musician. I play trumpet at OU and I am definitely grateful for the stage crew that assist with our concerts. They are performers in a sense too and things would not run smoothly without them. it is always inspiring to read about someone who is very passionate about something. I am sure whatever you decide to do in life you will succeed due to your high sense of motivation. This was a very inspiring blog and I wish you the best of luck for the semester.

    Like

  2. Hi Courtney! It’s nice to meet you! It is so cool that you really enjoy writing- I don’t think there are a lot of people now that still do because we have to do so much writing busywork in school! Creative writing is so fun and I like how you wrote your blog with creative words and in a way that it reads like you would speak. Your major sounds like a lot of work but it also sounds like you have a lot of fun! I’m looking forward to reading your blog!

    Like

  3. Hello Courtney, nice to meet you! I agree that the nature of this Indian Epics course is amazing in that you can work according to your own pace and your own style. Artistic freedom begets art, I feel. I think it’s admirable that you know the kind of person that you are and are proud of it. I wish more people would have that mindset as they go through life. Through your introduction, I can see that you are quite good with words so I am excited to read your stories going forward!

    Like

  4. Courtney, that’s so awesome that you like to write! I, honestly, do not like writing and don’t feel I am very good at it. It’s nice to meet a fellow redhead! It definitely gives me a lot of sass too. I would say I am not as “go and get it” like you are, I’m pretty reserved, but if you make me mad or I’m passionate about something, I can definitely get worked up. Thanks for sharing!

    Like

  5. Hi Courney! I have similar feelings about how this course is laid out. I love how you can work at your own pace and do things when you have free time and not blog when you are bogged down with work. Props to you for owning who you are and not being afraid to be you! That is one thing that people have so much trouble with. Nice to meet you!

    Like

  6. Hello Courtney! You seem like you have everything figured out but in reality you just have a near flawless work ethic. I wish I could be as dedicated and motivated to things like you are. I am definitely a last minute rush it kind of guy. It is very interesting how you are so into the English language and it definitely showed in your introduction. You combine words that shouldn’t be combined and you have a way of presenting it in a way that actually makes sense. I am looking forward to reading some of your stories filled with your creative use of language.

    Like

  7. Hi Courtney, nice to meet you. I got a kick out of reading your introduction. I like your sense of humor. I may have to refer to you if I need to find a large meaningful word to represent my future aspirations. I have crossed paths with people from your industry in the past. I find them to be interesting people from a totally different world than my world of technicalities. You would definitely not be the first “Bleeding Heart Liberal” to come out of that lifestyle. I thought that was a prerequisite.

    I think its cool that you know who you are. You present yourself as a bit of a contradiction and I relate to that. I am definitely this, kinda, some of the time, until I need to be the opposite. That was humorous the way you put it. I would recommend that you stop dating vampires, I have seen a few movies about them.They don’t seem to play well with others. One can never really know what they mean if they ask you to dinner, no?

    Like

  8. First off, I salute your vampire reference—and really, the rest of your introduction in general. I always find behind-the-scenes facts fascinating, so it was interesting to read about your work and your major. I also think it’s interesting that so many creative types walk that line of high-headed arrogance and crushing insecurity. It’s something I’ve thought about a lot, and I think that’s a necessary mentality for anyone in an artistic field. Anyone can technically sing, write, or pick up an instrument, so you’ve got to be confident if you’re going to think you’ve got something special enough to pursue it—but pursuing it also makes you vulnerable.

    Anyways, based off of everything here, you’ve already got my respect: it’s clear you know what you want and who you want to be, and also that you’re going to get where you want to go. Best of luck with that.

    Like

  9. It was really nice to read your introduction. I absolutely love how unapologetically honest you were in your self-description. I respect that kind of confident strength of self very much. Additionally, everything you wrote about your core values and ideals in conjunction with the style you wrote this introduction in has me eager to read some of your stories. I think we would get along very well. Once again, nice meeting you!

    Like

  10. I love your passion for words and how outspoken you are! I think it takes a lot to get up and perform in front of an audience (even if they have been drinking) so nice job on the karaoke!! So your majoring in stage managing? Everything you described it being like is a lot to take on and you’re right sometimes you guys get overlooked. Truth is nothing would be possible without people like you and your team!
    Hey I am also a redhead! #gingerpower
    And thanks for teaching me a couple of new words!

    Like

  11. Hi, Courtney! I can honestly say, I was very entertained while reading your introduction. It’s definitely paints a picture, and although you never said your name throughout it, I would have honestly wanted to get to know you regardless. I don’t think having a specific major has too much to do with a pursuit of a career. If you want to do something, do it. If you like writing, reading, or speaking words, you don’t have to be an English major. Just find your path and do it! 🙂

    Like

  12. Hello! I am surprised that I have not read this introduction yet either. I thought that I read all of them so far. It is cool that you have a passion for both language and music without majoring in either of the two. I also am in love with Mexican food… My first job was at a Mexican restaurant and I ate it way more than I should have.

    Like

  13. It’s so nice to meet you. I found your introduction to be very comical and original. You seem like a fun and free spirit. The title is very original and the word “doyenne” is very new to me. I like how you inserted little side notes as you explained your life and hobbies. Also, I’ve done theater in the past and I noticed that you said to appreciate your stage crew. I make sure to go out of my way to thank them as they always play a huge part in the success of the production.

    Like

  14. Hey Courtney, it’s great to meet you! I loved learning a little bit about you through your introduction and I think the title of your page was well-described in your intro. I totally have to agree with you about Mexican food, it is too good.

    Like

  15. Also, totally don’t know how I accidentally posted that comment without finishing it. But, I was going to say that I admire your dedication to the arts and I think it is such a great place to be in. You sound like a very hard worker and I wish you the best of luck in the future!

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s